Thursday, January 10, 2013
Thursday, January 10, 2013 Coco Lierfatte, Second Life Relationships, SL valentine's day No comments
Here's a Few Points from People Who Know First Hand.
Keeping a relationship going in SL isn't always easy, for a lot of people SL is an all you can eat buffet. So you need to be able to know how to handle your relationship so it can work out. So here is some advice on how you guys can keep your SL relationships alive, I asked a simple question to everyone, what do you do to make your SL relationship work. Here is the advice people have responded with, and my own personal advice as well.
Question: What do YOU do to make your SL relationships work?
B.W. - Honestly, trust and communication.
W.R. - In order for a SL relationship to work first and for most you have to be honest in terms of what the expectations are. Knowing from the launching point is this strictly going to be a SL relationship or can it grow? If you are an honest person from the start then it prevents false hope. If you can't take it to the next level or if it can then it makes it even better, cause you both will be happy.. However, you have to be careful, because I have heard disaster stories when people go RL. Look at my SL parents, they got married in RL.
L.M. - Having a relationship in SL requires a lot of communication. First, both parties have to be honest with themselves. Making up stories and constantly lying will not help the relationship because eventually those made-up stories and lies will catch later. Second, it is not only your emotions are being expressed, but your thoughts. Nobody can read minds, but at the same time each party has expectations. As an adult, we have expectations. It is a matter of meeting those. As my segue to this and lastly, compromise. My way or the highway attitude will never work. Indeed, both parties have their own ways or habits, but to make the relationship work, both have to meet half way. This is where sacrifices will come in.
R.R. - Basically I think SL relationships require even more work then RL, because you don't have the person in front of you. So it's a lot of work, both parties have to be willing to make it work.
My own advice for everyone out there - What people don't realize is that SL isn't just SL. No matter how your mind set is on SL is SL and RL is RL, real emotions get brought into the game. There are real people sitting behind their computer, it's not easy to keep your RL emotions out of it. A lot of people think just because SL is a game, that they can run around on their partners. It's not at all true, you need to be faithful to your partner in SL just like you would in RL. You need to understand that people aren't as strong as you think they are. Just because they act it in SL doesn't mean they truly are in RL. You need to respect yourself enough not to cheat, and respect your partner the way you do yourself. A relationship can't be based off what is real and what isn't, I've been in a relationship first hand, where I knew a guy was running around on me. He kept lying through his teeth, and it hurt. Not just because I had feelings for him, but because like everyone in SL I am a real person with real emotions. So my advice is; don't run around on your partner, it'll get back to them even if you don't think it will.
If you are true to yourself in SL, and you respect yourself enough not to cheat, you will be golden in your relationship. Communication, trust and hard work always pay off, but you need to have patience with the other person if you want your relationship to last. So keep strong, and know that everyone in SL is a real person behind a computer and they do have feelings. I wish everyone the best of luck in their relationships.