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Saturday, March 17, 2018

Interview with a Leprechaun- Lanai Jarrico Reporting...

Every year I like to track and find holiday mascots in Second Life and interview them. Of them all the leprechaun seems to be the most elusive. After turning over every mesh rock and braving the thick forest of the SL countryside I finally found one!  Leroy the Leprechaun was a strange character and obvious drunk or on some type of shamrock crack. We sat down for a talk until things got weird.

Interview with Leroy the Leprechaun

Lanai: Gotcha you little rascal!

Leroy: Let me go you oversized child!

Lanai: Now Now Leroy, there is no need to be rude. Relax, I just want to talk to you. I will let you go under one condition. You sit and talk to me without vanishing and I’ll waive the pot of gold owed to me for catching you.

Leroy: Fair enough cail’in. *straightens is little green suit* OMG! What are you doing?
Lanai: If there is one thing I’ve learned about Leprechauns it is they are not to be trusted on words alone so you will remain handcuffed to me until we are done.

Leroy: I didn’t know you were that type of girl! *smirks*

Lanai: Anyway,  there is a lot you don’t know about me. Would you like to find out? *hold up a stick*

Leroy: Ohhh into BDSM? Nooo that’s OK m’Lady! So what is it you’d like to talk about?

Lanai: Well, this was a harsh winter and I feel like the grid is recovering from it. I think the residents need some inspiration and new found enthusiasm. The grid seems kind of uneventful lately so I was wondering what you think should be done about St. Patrick’s Day.

Leroy: Well first of all pretty lady, these cuffs are too tight and second, that is not my problem I’m just a Leprechaun minding my own business and trying to keep from being captured. Blame the morale of the grid on Santa, I heard he gave out a record breaking amount of coal this past Christmas.

Lanai: I know, I’m still trying to figure out how to remove the gigantic pile of coal he left in my yard. I’ll be sure to write him a long letter about that. But seriously from your perspective how can we get the grid into St. Patrick’s Day?

Leroy: well from my ground level perspective. Some people need a swift kick in the pants and ejected off the grid. They don’t bring any luck to this holiday. They bring misery and mess. There are just too many arrogant people here these days and a bunch of lazy ones who seem to want something for nothing or stick to the old routine of things and aren’t innovative. I mean look at me? With the new mesh avatars on the market, I still look like a pasty noob because people with red beards of shorter stature are being left out. What about leprechauns?!? *sighs* Nobody gives a shouting shamrock about us.

Lanai: Yea… you do need a serious makeover but is that your only gripe?

Leroy: Of course not.  What is up with all the venue owners who don’t even know how to run a business? Half of them don’t even have up St. Patty’s Day decorations. What are they a bunch of Anti St. Patrick’s Day Bah Humbugs?  I think they are a waste of space on the grid and only add to the clutter.

Lanai: You seem pretty upset about that but you have a point. What do you think should be done?

Leroy: It would be nice to see everyone in green on St. Patrick’s Day. I think it is the only way to gauge how big this holiday is in Second Life. I also think it would be nice if Linden Labs actually interacted more with the grid and hosted official holiday events where everyone is invited. Not just their annual Birthday. Honestly I think it is lame. Poor residents wanting to be involved in SL’s birthday seem to be the only ones really putting in the effort to even make that possible. Official LL Parties will give residents a chance to meet new people and socialize on a grander scale in the community. It can also rid the grid of all the lame uninhabited venues too.  I mean who wouldn’t want to go to a Linden hosted St. Patrick’s Day event? I would be there.

Lanai:  Interesting idea. But there is no time to get that organized now.

Leroy: I may be small but my brain isn’t the size of a sunflower seed. The Lindens really need to implement incentives for this community or else boredom will set in and continue to hinder the growth of the population. I was recently at the bar with Cupid and he said the same thing. Where’s the love?

Lanai: *nods* With all the talk about the new Second Life grid many people are on the fence about applying new ideas. Some are even afraid of a total SL collapse due to people leaving this grid for the new one. But enough about that though.  So, Leroy what will you be doing on St. Patrick’s Day and speaking of cupid how is he doing? That guy never called me back.

Leroy: In regards to Cupid, he’s a player and he obviously got what he wanted from you. About St. Patrick’s day, I haven’t the slightest clue. The only thing I know is once I’m out of these cuffs, I’ll be off staying out of sight and trying to figure out why that stupid  dress went viral recently. Who gives a green glittered terd if it was white and gold or black and blue….It should have been green…

Lanai: *&$%! You Leroy nothing happened between Cupid and I. If anything he drank too much love potion on Valentine’s Day and ended up crying on my shoulder the whole time about erectile dysfunction and a crooked arrow. Anyway, of all the news, why would that dress be your biggest concern?

Leroy: Why would it go viral? I’d rather watch videos of screaming jackasses on loop for all eternity.

Lanai: Sounds serious.  I guess you have a point. People are just bored even off the grid. With that said. I hope everyone in Second Life has a great St. Patrick’s Day anyway. I know I will.

Leroy:  Hey, if you aren’t doing anything special that day. Look me up and you might get lucky!

Lanai: I will consider myself lucky if I don’t ever see you again! Get lost before I claim my pot of gold and beat you with this stick.


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