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Wednesday, June 12, 2013

The Red Light Districts of Second Life-Sex in the Virtual World –Nomad Aries Reporting…

Often in Second Life©  when people enter the virtual world, they meet people, connect with them in a relationship of some sort and want to express their emotions and feelings towards their significant other in some way.  Being a visual media, this would involve avies being able to virtually engage in sexual behavior with each other. For their own personal reasons, some people do not wish to enter into a relationship although they seek to act out their sexual preferences in a relatively safe environment where the risks involved are much lower than in the real world. Sex in Second Life is viewed by most of us as the ultimate standard of safe sex.

 There is an abundance of sex services and sex clubs available on Second Life and they range from mild to extreme and cover all sexual preferences, fetishes and "kinks" within Second Life's Terms of Use. 

 It is important to read the sections in the Terms of Use regarding sexual behavior on Second Life. There are definite laws on what is permissible and what is not and where sexual behavior is permitted and with whom. The penalties for disregarding these terms are indeed serious and depending on the severity of your transgressions, some have real life consequences. Sex sims in SL are Adult sims and only age-verified adults can enter the sims and no child avatars are allowed regardless of age verification. SL has created Red Light Districts and clubs where adult sexual behavior is permitted.

There is a wide variety in styles of sex clubs and services on SL, too many to mention by name but you can find them in search depending on your needs.  There are clubs and services where voice, text, pose balls, pictures, webcams and Skype are available.

 In this article I am focusing on Role Play Adult sims where text emoting and pose balls are used. Which sim you go to will depend totally on your preferences and needs. 

"M" is a friend I have known for some time on SL, she is comfortable with her sexuality, honest, intelligent and straight forward about what she wants sexually on sl.  M agreed to let me interview her regarding her experience in the adult sex sims of sl. M chooses to go to Role Play sims and uses only emotes and pose balls. M said " I personally love to type big, long emotes and I demand my partner do the same, with very few exceptions". They say the brain is the sexiest organ and I believe that. That's why I focus so much on writing skill. I try to be as poetic and passionate as possible".

 What sim M will go to depends totally on her mood and her need at a particular time. Sex isn't the only reason M will visit an adult sim, she likes to people watch, flirt and will occasionally, meet a new friend or two. These are very busy sims with traffic numbers that are the highest I have seen anywhere.

When I commented on this to M she replied “I don't think I'd take too kindly to having my body abused and ravaged in real life, but in SL it's a very sexy and safe fantasy to indulge in. Other people with more extreme kinks probably, or rather hopefully, do it the same way. They satisfy their kinks in SL without endangering themselves and others by doing it in real life".

There is quite a bit of communication required in a Role Play .It is good to know what you want before you approach someone as you will have to find someone who is into what you want to do. People tend to be upfront and detailed about what they want and need, this is easier if you are with a partner you know fairly well. Sometimes, engaging in sexual behavior or acting out a fantasy with a stranger is what some people desire. You should state your intentions directly. M is not interested in a relationship on SL and she is very obvious about letting it be known she is not looking for romance online. 

This is sex, not love. It's Role Play only.  If you are single, be prepared to negotiate compromise and pay for what you want. Yes, pay as in lindens, it is often part of the fantasy. As M put it “Being paid for SL sex is kind of a fetish of mine too, it’s very hot". It also takes a lot of work, emoting and setting up the activity and keeping it going takes time and effort.  Put another way, according to M “It’s to compensate me for all the time and effort I spend into guys who are clearly not good enough for me".

 Sometimes too, someone's "kink" just may not be yours but you agree for a price to engage in the activity .M has had this experience and says "(Some guys) have fetishes far too nasty for me NOT to charge them.  Case in point, I charged this one guy 5,000 L's for one hour for a fetish that was truly revolting".  M actually finds it hilarious that some people teleport into a sex sim and complain about having to pay for sex. It stands to reason if a person could get what they want free, they wouldn't be at the sim looking for it. If you have to pay, be ready to pay upfront, no one will do the act first and accept payment later.

While it is evident that engaging in sexual activity in the adult sims is safer than exploring this avenue in real life, I wondered if at any time M felt threatened by a person's actions or behavior?  M has experienced this, not too surprisingly and this is what she had to say about the incident-"When I first came to SL, I met someone at a sex sim. We were all friendly and playful together. He was a guy pretending to be a girl, which I didn't mind. We never got sexual, even though he wanted it to be. I should've never been his friend though. He seemed a little off, but so am I, but there was something subtly creepy about him. He started to want me in RL, then said he'd slit my BF's throat to get to me." 

I asked M what she did and what someone should do in a threatening situation like this? M replied “I immediately told him off, reported him and muted him. He got banned from the sim I liked to frequent, but his avatar would stand outside the sim for sometimes days on end.  Eventually, he vanished.  I'll never forget how creeped out I was by him ".

M explained to me that the more time she spent on the adult sims, the better she got at detecting situations that she deemed not safe and people who may be a problem for her. She always starts a conversation with a person who has approached her or she has approached, to feel out the situation. M says" With enough experience, you can just detect it about them very early on, sometimes immediately. You learn to end the conversation there, if you know what's good for you.  I used to be much more kind-hearted and understanding, now I'm brutal and blunt".

My advice to anyone travelling to the adult sex sims is to not give out personal real life information to anyone you role play with. Read about the sim you want to travel to, know what acts are permitted and what that sim specializes in, and make sure you pay attention to the rules of the sim or club you attend. Know what you want and be willing to negotiate. Be aware that sometimes if it doesn't feel right, it probably isn't and don't be afraid to decline or walk away. For some services you may require lindens at clubs that use voice, pics, and webcams or to "hire" someone.  Please remember it is role play, unless you are there with a "partner" or someone you know in real life doesn’t expect it to be more.  Please pay attention to the sim rating, keep adult sexual acts and behavior in the appropriate sims.  The Red Light Districts of SL sims are made so people can enjoy themselves and experiment in areas they would not try in real life. 


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