SLE Ticker



16 Years and counting...Got SL News? Get it Published! Contact Lanai Jarrico at lanaijarrico@gmail.com

Tuesday, May 18, 2021

Maximum Impact Charity Event: Stacey Cardalines Reporting

 


UPDATED POSTER-5-19-21



In this era of Covid-19, it is easy to forget that lots of things kill lots of people. Not all of them are the Rona. A million people a year across the world die of Malaria. That's double what the Rona did in America in a year. 67% of malaria deaths involve children under the age of 5. You should already be reaching for your wallet, folks.

Of course, why just write a check when you can instead write a check after watching supermodels fight for 2-4 hours? Money is awful hard to get these days, and one should expect a little bang for their buck.

Dylan Thomas once advised us to "rage, rage against the dying of the light." With that in mind, allow me to remind you that the Friday Morning Fight show ("Fight show" is one word, in this case, editor) is hosting a Maximum Impact Charity Event, with the proceeds being donated to the Malaria cause through the GiveWell charity apparatus. The Fight show is a professional wrestling event. If punching a girl in the face isn't Rage enough for you... well, to be quite frank, you might be a little too Hardcore for me.

This event is packed with action. This columnist has fought Sue Plex before, and Friday's audience is in for a show when she steps into the ring. Sue, who hails from the blood-soaked slums of Colorado, is widely feared throughout SL for her sadism. Vendetta is also on the card, and there are rumors around SL that she may have killed several girls in underground fights. The only distinction she makes between "Opponent" and "Innocent People In The Crowd" is that she doesn't get a paycheck when she attacks people in the crowd. They even have a fighter who looks like an anthropomorphic fox.

If you need more prompting than that, it's on you, not me. The show is Friday, May 21st, 10 AM SLT. In these dark times of plague, fight back against us by joining us for some Apocalyptic Asskicking!

1 comments:

  1. Updated card: https://twitter.com/demetonsl/status/1394386181966729220

    ReplyDelete

 
cookieassistant.com