So you were
at work in real life and saw the email that showed your items had been returned
from land you shared with your Second Life significant other. Or you logged on
and found out that you were de-partnered and your Second Life significant other
had blocked/muted you from contacting them.
These two scenarios may sound like
horrible ones, but they are often true in Second Life. So how do you mend your
broken heart? Surviving a break in
Second Life can be just as emotional and can take as much time as surviving a
real life breakup.
This article
looks at how you can recover from a Second Life breakup and mend your heart in
the process.
I recently
spoke with two avatars that had each suffered Second Life breakups within the
past 3 months. “Alicia” was partnered for 6 years in Second Life to “Mike”. She
and Mike had shared many Second Life and real life moments together. “You
simply cannot forget someone that you have spoken to almost every day for 6
years”, said Alicia.
“Mike and I
were inseparable. Though we never met in real life, we would talk via the
telephone and web cam with each other”. Back in December, Mike told Alicia that
he was leaving Second Life and focusing on his real life. Alicia has not spoken
to Mike since, not even in real life. “It’s been quite hard for me. To go from
having someone who is there for you for 6 years, suddenly not be there anymore.
The first few weeks were the hardest, as I would cry and avoided Second Life
all together. Luckily I have a strong Second Life support network” explains
Alicia.
“Bill” has
had a relationship recently end, but not in the same way as Alicia’s. “I check
my emails at work and saw that my items had been returned. I at first thought
it was a mistake. I sent my Second Life wife an email, to clarify. I received
nothing, so thought it was a system error or something. That night I logged on
and tried to teleport to the homestead I shared with my wife, Sam. It said
access denied. I didn’t notice at first that I had been removed from her
friend’s list; I simply thought my friend’s list had not loaded. I imed her
with no response, nothing. I could not believe what had happened. I finally
logged onto an alt and asked her what was going on and her response was that
she had grown bored of our two year relationship and had moved on. I was a
mixed range of emotions at that moment and could not believe what had
happened”, Bill explained.
Both Bill and
Alicia had advice for people to mend their hearts in Second Life. They both
suggested that after a breakup, you take a break from Second Life, whether it’s
a few days or a week or a month. They also agreed that once you do return to
Second Life, surround yourself with positive people. Do not go to previous
locations that remind you of the person you broke up with. Also avoid all
contact initially, let the other person contact you if they want to. Find new
hobbies in Second Life and get out and explore. “I rediscovered Second Life,
after being with someone for 6 years, “said Alicia. “It was hard to go on my
own, but after a while I did and I have made new friends. It still hurts and I
am single in Second Life, but I get better each day”.
Hi there,
ReplyDeleteThis is very well written, and absolutely the best advice I have ever seen on this subject. I hope you don't mind.....
but I am going to post a Headline link to this on my "Virtual World Technologist" blog. The logic applies to all virtual world relationships. Thank You.
JayR Cela :_)
Thanks
ReplyDeleteThis is what I needed to read....I just hope I can go through this.
ReplyDeleteMe too Glad someone else is going thru/has been this.
Delete