It’s that time of year again when love is in the air and Cupid is hard at work matchmaking across the grid. Every year the torch is passed to a new and improved Valentine’s Day mascot because it seems the previous ones go into retirement or disappear without a trace due to the groupies after his heart. So it was always a mission finding Cupid but this year he seemed to fall into my lap. I came across Cupid 2021 while out and about shopping for a pair of shoes, looked over and saw something stuck in the bushes so I went over to investigate.
Lanai: Hey there. Do you need a hand?
Cupid 2021:Huh? No, I don’t need any help at all, I mean to crash umm land down here I am incognito you know. Looking for people that need my help in the matching of the loves.
*ruffling around in the bushes*
Lanai: Well... I find it pretty creepy that you are snooping around this shoe outlet. Do you think you will find a lot of singles around here to play matchmaker to?
*helps him out the bushes*
Cupid2021: *coughs* observing, not snooping ok?! Well history shows there are usually a lot of men seeking a match in a place like this. It is a known hang out for women filling their time instead of finding men. And it is my job to assist them along with the process.
Lanai: Yea…. Men with foot fetishes maybe. Wait… Is that you Orion? I thought you were on a business trip! That outfit certainty does not look like a suit!
Cupid 2021: Hmmm oh hi Lanai! Fancy meeting you here. And hey, what you might not call a conventional suit, they do say this is the suit for the job. Come on you love the wings don’t you? So, I was tasked this year to help a lot of people find love and find their soulmate or at least one for a good long weekend.
Lanai: The wings work with that outfit just not with a halo... Your reputation in SL is’t that great, especially in the music scene. Anyways... I can respect that you want to do “charity work” in Second Life, but taking on being Cupid this year to stalk women at shoe stores? What exactly do you intend to do with those magic arrows?
Cupid 2021: First of all, as for my reputation, well you know how I feel about pixels um I mean people and what they think of me or us or our business, so it matters not to me. And again for the record, I am not stalking. This is a job I am taking very seriously. These arrows help people find their true love. It reveals it to them. Or…. It makes them utterly stupid and fall for the first person that comes along. Either way people get lucky for a bit. And not only that! How cool is it that I get to shoot people with arrows and not get arrested?!!?
Lanai: Fine come with me as I shop for some shoes. Your job is literally being a pain in the ass.. So let's get down to the reason for the season and the definition of love from your point of view?
Cupid 2021: Well yes, I mainly shoot in the ass, there is most of the meat, especially with those curvy anatomically incorrect avies aka “KFCs”. But love to me, well combine, happiness, sadness, frustration, joy, sweet, dread and then add in a lot of confusion and there you have love.
Lanai: Interesting…. Well SL Statistics show 62% of SL couples don't make it from one Valentine’s Day to the next, 25% have side pieces that seem to balance things out, 12% actually make it past 1 year and the remaining 1%... take it to Real life and live their happily ever after. Now that you are crowned the expert of Love; Mr. Cupid….With these statistics all laid out what advice can you give couples dabbling in that thing called love? What makes it work and what doesn’t?
Cupid 2021: Well first off, Ladies, seriously! Spending all your time at some shoe stores isn’t going to get you the man of your dreams unless that is he sells shoes for a living. My advice for all the other people out there. Communicate and trust the one you want to be with, don’t look for the short haul, look for the long term. I know in my own experience patience and perseverance won and now I am the winner. You can find it too, just stop over thinking everything and let my arrows do their work.
Lanai: She must be a lucky lady or miserable to actually have Cupid as her man. Any advice for single men out there having a hard time with love?
Cupid 2021: Oh she gets lucky, umm I mean is lucky I will say that, damn is she lucky. As for advice for men, I don’t think here is enough time for all that, but I will give the quick cliff notes. Men… LEARN what mesh is, you are in SL looking for love, not looking for a hookup behind the Dollar Tree?!!? Moving forward just stop acting broke or being a jackass. For the men who want their cake and a muffin on the side, sometimes you have a great woman right there in front of you but you still want to poke their “arrows” in others. STOP IT. Just STOP IT. Appreciate what you have and if you don’t have one, TRY harder, don’t expect one to fall from the sky. I am shooting them from the ground not while they are flying overhead. Stop looking up for them and look in some hearts.
Lanai: I guess that's good advice.. So for those who are already in a relationship, trouple, swinging or whatever, What kind of ways can they celebrate Valentine’s day?
Cupid 2021:Well that is a good question, and has a lot of different answers for many. Some say staying at home watching some Netflix together is great. Me I rather just blow my wad on some flowers, chocolates, great fine wine and dining, maybe some dancing then home for some “showing her how I love her” if you know what I mean?! But the main thing no matter what you do is to show your significant other that you love them and they mean the world to you. And well, if you aren’t that kind of romantic person you can just always take her shoe shopping!
Lanai: That’s good advice Cupid! You actually do have a sweet side. BTW what do you think of my shoes?
Cupid 2021: Well thank you! But let’s keep that between us for now ok? And regarding your shoes, you do have good taste but I think you can do a little better. Stop buying bargain bin shoes.
Lanai: o.O
And there you have it shootin’ straight from Cupid. Cheers xoxo :)
Happy Valentine’s Day SLE fans!
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