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Showing posts with label turkey. Show all posts
Showing posts with label turkey. Show all posts

Thursday, November 25, 2021

SLE ARCHIVES 2015: Thanksgiving Interview with a Protesting Turkey- Lanai Jarrico Reporting…

Thanksgiving is right around the corner, so it is time for another Holiday Mascot Interview. I truly enjoy meeting these characters in Second Life because something unexpected always happens. Last time I interviewed a Thanksgiving mascots, it ended in an argument between a Pilgrim and Indian. This year I decided I would talk to a Turkey about his perspective, so I went to a breedable farm...

Lanai: Excuse me Mr Turkey, my name is Lanai from The SL Enquirer.  Do you have time for an interview?

Turkey: Ugh that newspaper? pfft. Anyway,  My name is Justin and get away from me! I’m not in a very trusting mood this time of year.

Lanai: Hey now!  Relax, Justin. I’m not here to hunt you for my table. I just want to talk to you about Thanksgiving.

Turkey: What’s to talk about? It is not my favorite holiday, neither is Christmas. You humans need to think about making healthier choices that do not involve us.

Lanai: But Turkey is very healthy. It is a valuable source of protein and is a good source of iron, zinc, potassium, and phosphorus in addition to vitamin B6 and niacin, which are both essential for the body's energy production. Don’t make me get all educational about it, but I understand why you’d disagree with sacrificing yourself for us. I just wanted to get your perspective on this holiday.

Turkey: Well from my perspective, it isn’t all about zinc, potassium, vitamin B6 and blah blah blah all that other stuff. It’s all about being choked, feathers being plucked, and having my neckbone shoved up my ass! Then, to finish me off with a golden brown crisp. Doesn’t sound like a whole lot of fun does it?  If it were up to me, I would hunt down humans and stick them in the center of a table for my family to gather around and see how you like it, but we are herbivores. Besides that, you humans eat way too much junk food and would not be healthy to eat, even for a pig!

Lanai:That wasn’t very nice Justin.

Turkey: What’s not nice is the annual roundup of my fellow feathered fowls...Lanai

Lanai: I guess you have a point. So what do you suggest we use as our main staple for Thanksgiving ?

Turkey: If I really had a say. I would suggest that nice stocky Amaretto horse over there! Let me make my case for your brutal holiday.  You can make horse bacon, ribs, scrapple, pony sausage, rump roast, horse shoulder, horse rinds, jerky and  stew. Do I need to go on? Don’t get me started on the breedable dragons and meeroos if you can catch one.

By this time all the Breedable animals gathered around to listen in…

Horse: Hold on a second Justin there is such a thing as turkey bacon just saying!  Remember you have to live here with us so be careful what you tell this nosy reporter.

Meerroos: Wait. What?

Justin the Turkey: I will peck both of your eyeballs out. Mind your own business. The way you both populate Second Life, you outta be the ones hunted!

Horse: Don’t make me come over there Justin.

Meeroos: pfft. *scurries off*

Justin the Turkey: Oh yea ponyboy? I got one thing to say! *points at the horses*  Lady,take your pick. Each one is at least 2,400 pounds of meat!

Lanai: Wooooah. Wait a minute.

Horse: *gives Justin the hoof and gallops off into the stable*

Chicken: Keep me and my chicks out of this conversation. This is the one day of the year that we get a break, so CLUCK OFF!

Justin the Turkey: Easy there feathered friend!  What’s one more day? Let’s not mention Football season and all the damn chicken wings these humans consume.

Lanai: OK, this is getting out of hand.  Let me just clear the air before a riot breaks out on this farm. I am just here to talk about Thanksgiving from a Turkey’s perspective.

Unknown animal in the crowd: You picked the wrong farm lady!

Lanai: Is that so? *smirks*

In the meantime, Justin the Turkey and his flock gets into an argument with the Horses and chickens while Lanai quietly backs out of the barn and starts the turkey deep fryer.

It is clear that an interview with a Turkey was not the best idea, especially on a farm where other disgruntled animals live just awaiting for consumption. However you celebrate Thanksgiving  be thankful for the animals who unwillingly sacrificed themselves for you.

Happy Thanksgiving SLE Fans!

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

Talkin' Turkey... Where To Get Thanksgiving Dinner On SL - STACEY CARDALINES REPORTING


Thanksgiving is coming, and that means someone- maybe you- is hosting dinner. You get no sympathy from this journalist, who lives near Plymouth, Massachusetts in a town founded by Myles Standish. I host every year, no question. Big ol' Catholic family, too. Local turkeys know my name and fear me.

Cooking for crowds is always hectic and is rarely fun. All you can do is set out a ton of food and keep the alcohol flowing. That is how it works on SL, as well.

Avatars don't need to eat. We're not gigapets, and you could starve your avatar for years without her losing a pound. Eating is something you do for grins on SL. That said, you should try to do it well when you do it.

This goes double when it is Thanksgiving. You most likely eat with real people on Thanksgiving, but you may be on SL later in the day. You may even end up hosting an SL Thanksgiving party, and people coming to that party are going to be expecting turkey, gravy, cranberry sauce and all that other good stuff. You can f**k around on Easter and Christmas with roast beef or ham... but in November, you'd better be bringin' the Gobbler. If not, I can't even do business with you.

Since avatars don't need food, that leads to supply/demand problems when looking to layout a turkey dinner spread in your SL home or business. Even if you find a friggin' turkey, good luck finding butternut squash or green bean casserole. There may be a potato farm sim somewhere, and some other sim might have a cranberry bog, but you're eventually going to hit a wall somewhere on the menu if you try to score the ingredients individually.

Fortunately, the good people at the Food Connection have taken care of all that for you. You can go in, drop what I believe is 200 Ls and have a big huge table with all the Thanksgiving necessities. Turkey, mashed potatoes, corn, sweet potato pie, stuffing, some green thing that I assume is associated with Southern sorts of Thanksgiving, cranberry sauce, rolls, carrots and all the other stuff that Charlie Brown didn't come up with in his Thanksgiving special dinner.

Here's the address... Food Connection

A few facts on certain Thanksgiving menu items that will let you DOMINATE the dinner table conversation:

- Turkeys are not indigenous to the nation of Turkey. They are native, and were at one time unique, to North America. The Spanish sold them to Arab merchants, and the bird was introduced to Europe via Turkish markets. They have been common holiday fare in Europe since The 1600s. In the classic story A Christmas Carol, Scrooge springs for a turkey as he redeems himself.

- "Cranberry sauce" is what John Lennon says at the end of Strawberry Fields Forever. He liked nonsense words in his song, and he thought "cranberry sauce" sounded funny. I have read that he detested the stuff. Many misheard the lyric as "I buried Paul," and the Paul Is Dead rumors gained steam.

- The Irish became so dependent on potatoes that, when a blight hit Irish spuds in the 1840s, the resulting famine killed 25% of the Irish population. 

- Stephen King originally handed his publisher a story called Children Of The Asparagus, but his agent talked him into using Corn. OK, I made that up.

- People in the southern US, bitter over losing the Civil War, viewed Pumpkin Pie as a symbol of Yankee culture and refused to serve it. Sweet Potato Pie was substituted into holiday menus in the former Confederate states.

- Green Bean Casserole was invented by the Campbell's Soup people and is the major mover of Cream of Mushroom Soup. Dorcas Riley headed the group that invented it. Cranberry Sauce was invented by Ocean Spray, a Massachusetts cranberry conglomerate. The same guy that introduced cranberry sauce to America also invented Cranapple and various cocktails such as the Cape Codder, the Madras, the Sea Breeze, the Cosmopolitan, and- no joke- roll-on deodorant.

- The original spread at the first Thanksgiving was waterfowl, venison, lobster, clams, berries, fruit, pumpkin, and squash. 

Happy Thanksgiving!

Thursday, November 28, 2013

Thanksgiving Observed in Second Life – Glossom Resident Reporting…

“A thankful heart is not only the greatest virtue, but the parent of all the other virtues.” - Cicero

Thanksgiving is a holiday celebrated primarily in the United States and Canada. In the United States it is celebrated on the fourth Thursday of November and in Canada is in the second Monday of October. It is also observed in Liberia, Puerto Rico, Norfolk Island and …in Second Life. This year the big day is November 28th.

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

A Thousand And One Ways to Roast a Turkey: How do you Cook Yours? – Glossom Resident reporting…

Thanksgiving is one of the most celebrated holidays characterized by a gastronomic abundance and by a wealth of culinary traditions. It not only reflects the unique history of each cook, but also the rich diversity of America and beyond.

While the typical meal of the day consists of Thanksgiving nibbles such as turkey, cranberry sauce, sweet potatoes, pies made from seasonal fruits and vegetables, among others, how these foods are interpreted depends largely on who's cooking. Different family traditions and regional flavors make the Thanksgiving meal unique.

Thanksgiving is fast approaching, so it's time to get organized. Whip up your favorite recipes and get to work. But if you have not decided which Turkey recipe to use, we went around Second Life and asked some residents to share their own. Here are some mouth watering ways of cooking turkey to get you inspired. We would like to thank all who have shared their culinary secrets.